Santa's Beard

I wanna meet Santa Claus, the real real Santa
I wanna meet Santa Claus, the real real Santa
I wanna see Santa Claus, the real real Santa
He wants to meet ol' Santa Claus

I took my brother to the department store
He wanted to show Santa his Christmas list
He stood in line and he shook like a leaf
He's only five and a half goin' on six

He said, "Is that (that Santa) really Santa Claus,
really really (the real Santa) Santa Claus?
Is that (that Santa) really Santa Claus, really really Santa?
(I hope he doesn't pull Santa's beard)
Is that (that Santa) really Santa Claus,
really really (the real Santa) Santa?"
Hope he thinks that's Santa Claus

I picked him up and put him on Santa's lap
And then he pulled the pillow out of his shirt
He yanked the beard right on off of his chin
And in his eyes I could see he was hurt

He said, "You're not (not Santa) really Santa Claus,
you're really not (the real Santa) Santa Claus
You're not (not Santa) really Santa Claus,
you're really not Santa (he shouldn'ta pulled Santa's beard)
You're not (not Santa) Santa Claus,
you're really not (the real Santa) Santa"
He's just helpin' Santa Claus

He's just helpin' (helpin' Santa) Santa Claus,
the real (the real Santa) real Santa
He's helpin' (helpin' Santa) Santa Claus,
the real (the real Santa) real Santa
He's just helpin' (helpin' Santa) Santa Claus,
the real (the real Santa) real Santa
He's just helpin' Santa Claus

He's just helpin' (helpin' Santa) Santa Claus,
the real (the real Santa) real Santa
He's just helpin' (helpin' Santa) Santa Claus,
the real (he shouldn'ta pulled Santa's beard) real Santa
He's just helpin' (helpin' Santa) Santa Claus,
the real (the real Santa) real Santa
He's just helpin' Santa Claus